Wednesday, 8 December 2010

Desperately Seeking Something

Maybe it’s my age. Is 36 the time that you start looking for something more challenging work-wise? Something that truly satisfies you?

Or, more likely, it’s when you become a Mum. That life changing event that makes you question everything, look at it all just a little differently. You get this new license, a new drive and kind of freedom that makes you question what makes you happy. It gives you perspective, isn’t that what they say?

I can remember hearing about women, before I had kids, who had taken a career swerve once they’d become Mums. Re-trained as a midwife, or become a teacher, started a whole new chapter in their working life. And thinking that it seemed a bit of a cop out. They were probably only doing it to get the longer holidays. But I get it now and see they were rather brave. 

For me it was becoming a Mum for the second time that changed things. When it was just Miss L, it was a given that I’d go back to work, pick back up where I left off and I was happy to do so. But when Little P came along, it felt different, there was a shift in the balance. I lost some of my work oomph.  

Although I’ve always worked, and enjoyed working, I’ve never really decided on my path, I’ve never had a plan, it’s just kind of happened.  Career isn’t a word that sits easy with me as it suggests a degree of drive, some desire to have one. I have a job. There’s no real passion for what I do right now. It doesn’t do it for me.

I’m lucky, I know that, very lucky and I’m genuinely grateful for that. I know that I should probably just keep my head down and be grateful for my final salary pension.

But ....

I want more.

There. I’ve said it.

I know that I don’t actually have any money in the bank. I know that we have a gigantic mortgage. I do know all of this. But still..... 

I read a definition of ‘Mumpreneur’ the other day and it stuck with me.

‘A mumpreneur is someone who seeks an opportunity, takes a risk or innovates to make the change in her life that will allow her to fulfil her role as a parent in a way that is more meaningful to her.’

I’m a total wanabee mumpreneur.

I’m up for a bit of risk, I could give innovating a good crack. Seeking opportunities? Boy, am I seeking. I feel like I do nothing but seek these days. And I could certainly do with a bit more meaning to it all. 

And it seems I’m not the only one. Within the last few weeks alone, two of my friends have told me about their business ideas. Their little thoughts, their lightbulb moments. I’m surrounded my smart, clever, women who talk with passion about their ideas. There are enough ideas kicking about to start a mums’ business commune. We could become a little co-operative and take over the world. If we had the money.

So what happens next? Either you go for it, or sit back and forever wonder ‘what if?’.

I don’t much like ‘what if?’. I’m more of a ‘if you don’t try you’ll never know’ kinda girl. Nothing makes me more proud than hearing Miss L repeat this phrase to her sister, so confident and sure, like it’s her own little pearl of wisdom. I drive it into her at every opportunity. Give it a go. What have you go to lose?

Well, in reality, for me there’s quite a bit to lose isn’t there. It’s a big old leap of faith to take with no bag of cash security blanket.

But I’m not a fan of having regrets in life either, so maybe something’s go to give. I shall keep playing Euro Millions and let you know how I go. 

Caroline is the Scribbling Mum who describes herself with the slogan,'Balancing life, work, love, friendships and two kids with my 'itch' to write.' and she couldn't be more right. Already an established and highly popular blog if you haven't yet given it a visit do make sure you nip over and subscribe for updates.



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